The Quiet Paradox of Leadership: Holding Two Opposed Ideas and Leading Beyond Self

“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald

1. The Paradox of Leadership

Over the years, I have drawn leadership lessons from diverse sources. Leadership never lives in a silo; it transcends disciplines because it is both universally the same while being so completely unique in every context. The amazing David Gardiner, co-founder of The Motley Fool, introduced me to this quote from F. Scott Fitzgerald and I learned a very valuable lesson in leadership - the quiet paradox of leadership.

In leading others, we live in this tension: we must develop ourselves while serving others; we must act with intention while empowering autonomy. The paradox Fitzgerald captures invites us to hold two truths: “It’s about me” (mastery, growth, clarity) and “It’s not about me at all” (others’ flourishing, team outcomes, culture). The mark of strong leadership is navigating that tension without being derailed.

2. Investing Insight: Gardner’s “Dark Clouds I Can See Through”

David uses a striking metaphor: even when he sees ‘dark clouds’ around a company, he maintains conviction in what he believes will shine through.  In doing so, he holds two opposing ideas simultaneously – risk and opportunity; difficulty and potential. This clarity amid contradiction mirrors the leadership challenge: we must calmly face uncertainty and simultaneously foster belief and direction.

3. From Markets to Minds: Leadership Application

Just as Gardner holds “dark clouds I can see through” while staying grounded in realism, we lead teams by holding:

• Vision & Reality – Inspiring possibility while acknowledging barriers.

• Self-mastery & Service – Developing our own capacity while focusing on others’ growth.

• Strategy & Culture – Crafting clear direction while nurturing human connection and co-creation. This is akin to living the paradox: leading with competence and humility; holding power and letting go. And when we do so, we function, we enable progress, not just talk about it.

4. Practice & Reflection: Leading from Paradox

• Begin a leadership meeting by naming the mode: “Let’s hold vision for now”, then later shift to “Let’s move to execution”.

• In coaching conversations: invite the other person both to reflect on what I need to improve and what we need to enable in others.

• Personal journal: Explore two opposed statements – “I must lead from strength” and “I will lead by stepping back”. Sit with that tension.

• Team culture: Encourage a mindset of “I am accountable” whilst promoting “We own this together”.

5. Final Thought

To lead well is not to resolve all paradoxes - it is to live with them, manage them, and draw strength from them. By holding the impulse to lead from our mastery and yet lead for others’ growth, we become the intelligent, emotionally aware leaders the world needs.

In the spirit of Fitzgerald’s quote and Gardner’s investing mindset: hold the tension of “me” and “not-me,” stay curious, stay grounded, and lead not only with expertise but with humility.

If you’re on a leadership path, whether in education, corporate, consultancy or beyond, I invite you to lean into this paradox. Not to get comfortable, maybe, but to get effective. Because it’s in the balance of those two ideas that leadership thrives.

“Leadership is all about you...and it’s not about you at all.”

I’d love to hear from you: What two opposing ideas are you holding as a leader, and how are you navigating their tension?